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Experts say men score higher in libido, while women's Women looking for sex Los angeles drive is more "fluid. Birds do it, bees do it, and men do it any old time. But women will only do it if the candles are scented just right -- and their partner has done the dishes first. A stereotype, sure, but is it true? Do men really have stronger sex drives than women?
Well, yes, they do. Study after study illustrates that men's sex drives are not only stronger than women's, but much more straightforward. The sources of women's libidos, by contrast, are much more difficult to pin down. It's common wisdom that women place more value on emotional connection as a spark of sexual desire. But women also appear to be heavily influenced by social and cultural factors as well. Here are seven patterns of men's and women's sex drives that researchers have found.
Bear in mind that individuals may vary from these norms. The majority of adult men under 60 think about sex at least once a day, reports Laumann. Only about one-quarter of women report this level of frequency. As men and women age, each fantasize less, but men still fantasize about twice as often. In a comprehensive survey of studies comparing male and female sex drives, Roy Baumeister, a social psychologist at Florida State University, found that men reported more spontaneous sexual arousal and had more frequent and varied fantasies.
This isn't just true of heterosexuals, he reports: gay men also have higher frequency of sex than lesbians at all stages of the relationship. Men also say they want more sex partners in their lifetime, and are more interested in casual sex. What turns women on? Not even women always seem to know. Northwestern University researcher Meredith Chivers and colleagues showed erotic films to gay and straight men and women.
They asked them about their level of sexual arousal, and also measured their actual level of arousal through devices attached to their genitals. For men, the were predictable: Straight men said they were more turned on by depictions of male-female sex and female-female sex, and the measuring devices backed up their claims.
Gay men said they were turned on by male-male sex, and again the devices backed them up. For women, the were more surprising. Straight women, for example, said they were more turned on by male-female sex.
But genitally they showed about the same reaction to male-female, male-male, and female-female sex. Michael Bailey, a Northwestern University sex researcher and co-author with Chivers on the study. By contrast, women may be more open to same-sex relationships thanks to their less-directed sex drives, Bailey says. Bailey's contention is backed up by studies showing that homosexuality is a more fluid state among women than men. In another broad review of studies, Baumeister found many more lesbians reported recent sex with men, when compared to gay men's reports of sex with women.
Women were also more likely than men to call themselves bisexual, and to report their sexual orientation as a matter of choice. In his review, Baumeister found studies showing many ways in which women's sexual attitudes, practices and desires were more influenced by their environment than men:.
Why are women's sex drives seemingly weaker and more vulnerable to influence? Some have theorized it is related to the greater power of men in society, or differing sexual expectations of men when compared to women. Laumann prefers an explanation more closely tied to the world of sociobiology. Men have every incentive to have sex to pass along their genetic material, Laumann says. By contrast, women may be hard-wired to choose their partners carefully, because they are the ones who can get pregnant and wind up taking care of the baby.
They are likely to be more attuned to relationship quality because they want a partner who will stay around to take care of the. They're also more likely to choose a man with resources because of his greater ability to support .
Men and women travel slightly different paths to arrive at sexual desire. It is more about the anticipation, how you get there; it is the longing that is the fuel for desire," Perel says. Women's desire "is more contextual, more subjective, more layered on a lattice of emotion," Perel adds.
Men, by contrast, don't need to have nearly as much imagination, Perel says, since sex is simpler and more straightforward for them. That does not mean that men do not seek intimacy, love, and connection in a relationship, just as women do. They just view the role of sex differently. Sex is the language men use to express their tender loving vulnerable side," Perel says. While researchers find it tricky to try to quantify issues like the differing quality of male vs.
Men, on average, take four minutes from the point of entry until ejaculation, according to Laumann. Women usually take around 10 to 11 minutes to reach orgasm -- if they do. That's another difference between the sexes: how often they have an orgasm during sex. And not only is there a difference in reality, there's one in perception, too. With men's sex drives seemingly more directly tied to biology when compared to women, it may be no surprise that low desire may be more easily treated through medication in men.
Men have embraced drugs as a cure not only for erectile dysfunction but also for a shrinking libido. With women, however, the search for a drug to boost sex drive has proved more elusive. Testosterone has been linked to sex drive in both men and women. But testosterone works much faster in men with low libidos than women, says Glenn Braunstein, MD an endocrinologist and chair of the department of medicine at Cedars Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles and a leading researcher on testosterone treatments in women.
And while the treatments are effective, they are not as effective in women as in men. A testosterone patch for women called Intrinsa has been approved in Europe but was rejected by the FDA due to concerns about long-term safety. But the drug has sparked a backlash from some medical and psychiatric professionals who question whether low sex drive in women should even be considered a condition best treated with drugs. With all the factors that go into the stew that piques sexual desire in women, some doctors say that a drug should be the last ingredient to consider, rather than the first. Men think more about sex.
Men seek sex more avidly. Women's sexual inclinations are more complicated than men's. Women's sex drives are more influenced by social and cultural factors. Women take a less direct route to sexual satisfaction. Women experience orgasms differently than men. Women's libidos seem to be less amenable to drugs.
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Life with Cancer. Laumann, PhD, professor of sociology, University of Chicago. Baumeister, R. Personality and Social Psychology Review; vol 5: pp Baumeister, Psychological Bulletin, vol. Shifren, J. Obstetrics and GynecologyNovember ; vol pp Laumann, E. All rights reserved.Women looking for sex Los angeles
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